Do you ever feel like giving up?
Do you ever feel like walking away?
Why does life have to be so hard?
I don’t think I can do this!
Can you feel the pull? There seems to be this almost gravitational force working against us in our hearts and minds. The economy is terrible, my finances are in a mess and no one feels like they have any control over where their life is headed. I am tired of fighting with my wife. The kind of future I want for my kids is in question. My whole life feels like it is for nothing. Does this sound familiar? I don’t know about you, but my life is really hard right now. The more good I try to do the stronger the pull against myself. Evil doesn’t sleep; I feel it’s resistance working against all of us. I feel like giving up. It would be so much easier if I just found a job and gave up on these stupid dreams of being a writer. I hate the tension!
So what do you do with the crazy messages haunting our existence?
You must realize you are not alone. Jesus felt this way in the Garden of Gethsemane, and we all know his famous words on the cross, “Why have you forsaken me?” Jesus experienced the same problem being a man that we all experience. The real problem for all of us is that we must live our lives one day at a time. We can’t see the future and we can’t change the past. The only choices we really have are the ones we make today.
Don’t give up! Stand and fight! Don’t run away!
Make good choices today! One day at a time.
Yep, the gravitational pull of this or the mind games the enemy plays with us is brutal. Probably the toughest thing I’ve encounter on the way to the ‘desires of my heart–Psalm 37:4′. However, the moments Father God shows up to Father my heart makes all the struggle worth it. Takes my breath away and brings the life of the Kingdom where the the world and me is forever changed. Thanks for reminding me of all this Mike!
Isn’t it great to be rescued Greg! It just never seems to be when we won’t it; which is ususually right now. Keep fighting brother! I know you are in the war.
This truly hit home. I have been going through some tough things at work and this felt like a “whisper” from God. Don’t give up! Stand and fight! Don’t run away! This is just the encouragement that I needed. Thanks Mike I Love you Man..
Thanks Bryan! I love you too man! Stay in the game until it is time. Don’t let resistance be the winner. The choice is best made to go out on your own terms, when God says it is time.
Dude…Get out of my head….Thanks, I needed that ….really bad! Thanks
I am glad to know someone is as crazy as I am Eric! Love you son!
Hi J. Michael, I found your blog from Michael Cartwright’s website. Thank you for reminding us that Jesus understands how we feel! I can relate to your statement, “It would be so much easier if I just found a job and gave up on these dreams of becoming a writer.” I am so thankful we can rely on our Perfect Savior to help us when we feel like quitting. “Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved” (Psalm 55:22).
What is one to do when they DO quit on their God given marriage and family, like I did in 2009/2010? After 26 years of life together, and 4 sons later, my childhood sweetheart (whom I had zero contact with for 35+ years) came into a funeral visitation one night and then attended the funeral I….yes….I conducted for my deceased 18 year old nephew. This was back in 2006. When I saw her, my jaw hit the floor, stunned at her external beauty and magnetic personality that hadn’t changed since we were kids. From there, one email a year…maybe….just to ask about her life, catch up on news of her family members, nothing at all seductive, loving, or inappropriate. However, as my marriage had been in a rough spot/dance for pretty much the whole time (and we saw lots of counselors), it hit the fan when I was deployed in 2009. I allowed the enemy to have his way, and I took his bait…hook, line, and sinker, ended up having a sexual affair with my childhood sweetheart (also married 26 years….to an alcoholic/addict….also with 4 kids). Played the deception game with my wife, sons, and community for several months, and got away with it in the eyes of people (she lived in GA; I lived in Iowa). I got deployed overseas in 2010; had every opportunity to end the affair, cried daily….loudly, when off work as a military Chaplain (what a sham I am!!!). “Accidentally” sent an email to my wife that was meant for my adulterous girlfriend, and got a call in the middle of the night from my wife asking about the email. I confessed; she went hysterical; I failed to produce fruit/behavior in keeping with repentance due to the powerful deception and lust of the eyes, lust of my flesh, and the pride of my life. My wife wanted to reconcile, but I did not. Ultimately, when I returned from deploying, I re-engaged with the lover, had many conversations with my wife since I lived up the road from her and the 4 sons in Iowa (they gave me the boot….the van was packed with all my belongings in it when I flew home from deployment….I was not allowed in my home to pack my stuff, say anything to anyone, because I refused to end the affair). So I stayed in Iowa, only 500 yards from my family living in the country, for 8 months. My wife came over several times; we talked….well….mostly she talked, and I chose deception/lies over truth and repentance, even though she/we successfully seduced each other twice in those 8 months. In her words, she wanted the finances put in her name and not mine, so she came over to my “home” one night about 1am with separation/divorce papers from a lawyer. I was taking Ambien for sleep and signed the divorce papers, giving her 100% of the home, savings, retirement, assets, everything. I stayed in Iowa to try reconciling, and ended the affair then started it back numerous times…in response to the lover’s initiating contact. I would qualify as your basic passive, deferential male, married to a strong willed woman with a great head on her shoulders that won every single issue we had. That’s not an incrimination on her as much as on me for not having the intestinal fortitude to stand up and love her with tender strength as Christ loved the church and died for her. I know all the right answers; but this fool was bent on folly, bringing ruin and destruction to my family. I personify the scriptures in Proverbs that speak of an adulterer, a fool, a simpleton; my lover….now my second wife….personifies Proverbs 5 and those that speak of an adulterous woman. I left Iowa on the brink of suicide about a year ago…my sons refused to have any interaction with me at all…understandably so since my affair was found out in January 2010. They haven’t interacted with me since, except for one of them, and then only very briefly. I have been in therapy and on meds to survive, but I made the God-awful choice to bow to my lover’s desire to spend the rest of her life with me (just like I did with my first wife), and we married late last year. I moved to GA, 1,000 miles away from my 4 sons, married the one I committed adultery with, and I have ZERO peace. My peace departed the day my affair got found out. That was January 26, 2010. I’ve had (and deserve) a huge boulder on my chest ever since. Consequences of sin and disobedience!!!! How do I make my way back to the family I left? I’ve disqualified myself from being a father, a man of God with integrity, disowned by my sons indefinitely, lost all my income and job, my military position, my ordination, my wife, my home, my civilian job, my church, my friends….all for taking the bait. Does this mean my heart is stone hard and I’m going to burn in hell like many are telling me in the church? My decisions have created a “grand canyon” between me and God, family, church, friends, other believers, etc. They quote 2 Timothy 3:1-9, I Tim. 5:24. The church has shut it’s door to me in the name of discipline. What’s a person to do?
Alone in Atlanta